Will science ever prove...part 2

On a follow up to my scientificish post of a yesterday,  there have been some new findings in regard to "climate change".

The dude who started the Weather Channel did some research, and found that there was a direct relationship between the rising average temperature and fewer temperatures being taken. Allow me to apply my dazzling intellect to this statement.

If you try to measure the average yearly temperature at your house, but only take one sample you will have a less accurate reading. Go figure. Measure it twice, and it will be an average and change. Every time you add another sample to a set, you improve the accuracy of that set. So likewise, if you take fewer samples it will be less accurate.

The study shows that starting in 1990 monitoring stations around the world were shutdown, from 6000 to 1500 stations around the world. It's no surprise that the temperature is less accurate than before, and the global increase coincided with this shut down of stations. The real kicker to this study is the location of the stations that were shutdown. They were all in statistically lower temperature reading areas!

Did  they think it wouldn't affect the readings, or did they (NOAA, no relation to the ark builder) do it on purpose knowing that it would increase the average temperature around the globe? it's all very shady and questionable. If you ever start to question whether or not global warming is a fact, take a look at Washington D.C. over the last few days. Find out the last time there was this much snow, as well as such low temperatures.

I think that reporters have been on the streets of D.C. for the last two days looking for Mr. Gore, but as usual when it's snowing he can't be found (that's why he's never been to Canada). How many times are politicians going to try and sell us the garbage of global worming.

http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2010/02/09/john-lott-joseph-daleo-climate-change-noaa-james-hansen/

Milk, Bread, Post-its, and Donald Trump.

I was perusing Al Gores' latest invention the "World Wide Web", and I came across an article about Sarah Palins' hand. I'm not joking there are numerous problems affecting our nation today, and the most pressing matter in some areas of government was where Sarah Palin writes reminders. Some people use Crackberries, some people use Post-Its, and others use their hands. For me it all depends on what's available, I have my iPhone (evil capitalist Apple company sucked me in), I have a small notepad, and the one thing that is always with me? MY HAND! If all else fails, I have my awesome hand. They are useful for many things. Waving at the police officer after he pulls me over, shaking hands with people I've just met, shoving food in my mouth at an alarming rate, and taking notes. The good thing about them is that unless I'm involved in some freak industrial accident, they'll always be there. I can't misplace them, the battery can't die, and they can't lose their stickiness because it got fuzz on the strip.

I got slightly off topic for a minute, SORRY, allow me to digress. White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs criticized Mrs. Palin for using her hand for notes, citing that someone who so heavily commented on President Obamas' use of the teleprompter has no business using notes. If I'm not mistaken the former governor gives most if not all of her speeches WITHOUT NOTES, period. This is a radical departure from our President who cannot function without said speech making device. If in fact she decided that there was something so vital that she wanted to get it perfect, who are you to criticize her method?

He accidently showed the interviewer the shopping list that he so "slyly" wrote on his hand. The list was Milk, Bread Eggs, Hope, and Change. I can only assume that the first three were things that his wife told him to pick up after leaving work for the day. This is no big deal as we've all had to go pick something up from the store. As I stated before, maybe he ran out of Post-Its, maybe his Crackberry battery died, who am I to judge when his hand was obviously the only thing available? The part of the list that got me though was the Hope and Change.

Isn't that what America voted for in 2008? Didn't that already come to the White House? Why would you have to go shopping for it? Is it something that he feels he isn't getting in his current position and needs to look elsewhere, or did his wife tell him to pick those up at the store as well? Hope that you get home on time for once or you lose your TV privileges for a week. Change your attitude Mister or I'll be forced to take away your X-Box for the month. What was he thinking? The American public currently has very little Hope that anything will Change in Washington. That is other than the amount of money thrown away on national parks on the island of St. Croix, and other projects that do absolutely nothing to stimulate are rapidly shrinking economy and job market. BLAH!!!

If there was some sort of political point to be made, I think that Mrs. Palin actually got the better point across without even trying to. She managed to make Liberals point out, that Liberals are raging idiots that spend too much time worrying about how she remembers things (if she had used a string around her finger she would have been criticized for poor fashion accessories), and not enough time worrying about things that the American public want taken care of . We don't want to hear campaign slogans again (I've never liked them), we want to see results from you. We want results on things like unemployment, a soaring deficit, steroids in baseball, and most importantly whether or not Trumps' comb-over should be outlawed in the 48 contiguous states (Hawaii and Alaska already have laws in the works). 

Until next time please ponder one of the questions that helps me guide my life.

"Can you tell me how to get, how to get to Sesame Street?"

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2010/02/09/gibbs-scrawls-grocery-list-hand-jab-palin/

Will science ever prove…

 

The Beginning according to Science

1 In the beginning was the Puddle, and the Puddle was of Pre-animate biological mass, and the Pre-animate biological mass was Goo.

2 The same was in the beginning with Goo.

3 All things were made by Goo; and without Goo was not anything made that was made.

4 In Goo was life; and the life was the spontaneous splicing of nitrogen molecules, which came from the Big Bang¹, with the Puddle to form single celled organisms that evolved into the plants and animals we know and love today.

4 ¹ LeMaitre 1:1 At some point in fininte time approximately 13 billion years ago, a primordial hot and dense condition has continually expanded into the universe that we know today.

I know some people might get slightly miffed that I used The Gospel of John as a template for the opening of this post. I apologize to you profusely, as my intent is only to show how ridiculous I believe the claims of “modern science” to be.

This all stems from Global Warming debates and Evolution. I am constantly amazed that people hold to these THEORIES as fact when there is no evidence to support their claims. Please indulge me and let me explain how my “uneducated” mind sees these theories individually.

I’ll start with Global warming.

We’re “heating up the world” with our vehicle emissions, uncontrolled cow flatulence (google cow flatulence tax in NY), and overall “carbon footprint”. Tracking weather patterns over the last 100 years (that’s 100 out of the approximately 13 BILLION years) show that temperatures around the globe have increased a total of 1.33⁰ F +/- 0.32⁰  over the last 100 years. REALLY???? 1 degree over 100 years is cause for alarm??? At that rate Antarctica would become a tropical paradise in about 130 CENTURIES! That is a REALLY long time (-57⁰ F to 80⁰ F that’s 130 deg diff, not to insult your intelligence). How do they know what the average oceanic temperature was back when “cavemen” existed? Does Doc Browns’ DeLorean actually exist? I doubt both of those things are the case. If you really believe that the Earth has been around for 13 Billion years, you will never be able to convince people that 1 Century holds enough data to prove your theory that the earth is heating up to the point where I should trade my 10 mpg Jeep for a Toyota Prius with brake problems just to give us 15 more minutes at 70⁰ instead of 70.0000000000000000000000000001⁰.

The conversation about earth warming up to the point of extinction for all beings brings me to my second topic, evolution. I will try and keep it short and sweet, as I know staring the computer screen in rapt appreciation of my dazzling intellect can be somewhat detrimental to your occular health (that’s 25 cent word, you can send your donations through pay-pal). If in fact the world is heating up, why should we care? According to Darwinism the strongest will survive the changing conditions of the earth. Some of us will evolve heat dissipaters and water retention flaps to enable us to live in the increased temperatures on what small land masses are left; while the rest will take to living in and out of the water like Kevin Costner in Waterworld (don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about, that movie is a Classic). You can actually see the changes staring to take place, as you get older your body is already developing pockets for catching fluids all over the place, and you thought they were non-functional “wrinkles”.

All in all I really hope that scientists will stop trying to convince me of what happened in the past (The Bible spells it out rather well), and start looking to use their God-given skills and talents to solving REAL problems of the future. Like curing cancer, proving SPAM is edible, and most importantly solving the formula for a successful Sitcom (Seinfeld wasn’t really “about” anything).

As the great thespian Roy Scheider once said in the classic American film Jaws, which should not have lost the Oscar to that hack job One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest (what does that even mean?).

“You’re gonna need a bigger boat!”…

New experience

My wife was telling me the other day that I should create a blog, my response was something like "why would I do that???" I mean honestly, what would I have to say to the internet where no-one is really listening? Blog, how ludicrous!!

Fast forward through the last few days and I've constantly been disappointed in what is happening in our country and our world. People water boarding their own children, kids clothes that so closely resemble "unmentionables" that even Ms. Perez Hilton thinks it's offensive (Former Ms. California might find that humorous), and just all around stupidity is pervasive in our world.

This prompted me to ask my wife Tawna to help design a blog this evening. I don't have a whole lot to say this evening about all these things as we're establishing format and getting things ready to look "hip and trendy". Well maybe not hip or trendy, but at least it will look like me. AAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I know that's a scary thought)

Be back soon.